Shawna fondly remembers her daughter Hayley's first smile. "I walked over to pick
her up and she smiled so big for me, I almost cried!" says the mother of one.
First smiles are just the start of the amazing emotions a baby will show and develop
during the first year. As early as 3 months, a baby already may be "reading" expressions
and storing the information in her growing memory bank. These stored experiences
will help her to manage and control emotions as she grows.
Is that Gas or a Real Smile?
At 3 months of age your baby may enjoy socializing with you and other immediate
members of your family. She may smile easily and have a keen interest in other human
faces.
"Babies learn about others and their emotional expressions when they have the opportunity
to watch, listen and participate in social interactions," says Norbert Herschkowitz,
M.D., who along with Elinore Chapman Herschkowitz, co-authored A Good Start in Life...Understanding
Your Child's Brain and Behavior.
You also can expect to hear the first of many giggles during this time. "Around
the age of 4 months, the surest way to get a laugh is make funny little brrr-sounds
and kiss or tickle your baby's stomach," says Herschkowitz.
The reactions you have will have a significant influence on how your baby reacts
to various situations in the future. Arlene Walker-Andrews, professor of psychology
at Rutgers University in New Jersey, says that infants develop the ability to read
our emotions early on. "We find that infants recognize their parent's expressions
by about 3 1/2 months of age," says Walker-Andrews.
Because infants watch their parents so closely, it's important to keep emotions
in check. Babies sense emotions of anxiety just as much as happiness. Interact with
your baby using pleasant tones and expressions. When your baby is alert and feeling
social, respond to her smiles and cooing noises. Listen and talk to your baby. Respond
to her in a warm and soothing way when she is anxious or frightened and crying.
Try swaddling her in a blanket or carry her close to your body in a sling. Walk
or rock her with soft music playing.
She's Quite a Character!
During the 6 to 9 month period, your baby may start to develop characteristics that
are uniquely her own. By now, you are familiar with her temperament and you know
she exhibits a "tone" that is distinctively her own: Perhaps she gets excited when
it is bath time or snuggles into your arms when it's bedtime. She has retained input
on who has expressed positive or negative emotions to her. A sudden rise in someone's
voice or the tension in mother's touch have all been stored in her memory bank.
At this age, a baby will enjoy being around people she feels loved by. A growing
attachment has developed to her immediate caregivers, so it is natural for her to
feel the beginnings of "separation anxiety." Most babies at this age will exhibit
anxiety and fear when their parents are out of sight.
Although unnerving for parents, this behavior is normal. It simply means your baby's
memory center in her brain is maturing. Games like peek-a-boo and hide and seek
will help her to learn that people and objects disappear and return.
Model Behavior
As your baby approaches the final months of her first year, she may be more capable
of demonstrating a degree of varied emotions. She may distinguish between people
she knows well and those she does not. She may be more mobile now and curious to
explore her surroundings on her own. Her new-found independence actually aids her
in feeling safe and secure as she moves away from and returns to, her trusted loved
ones. Unpleasant encounters that once caused tears may now elicit frowns or just
head turning to signal her disapproval.
She may show signs of frustration or anger. You're likely to witness her first "temper
tantrum." Runt remembers her daughter Hayley's first tantrum when the baby was 9
months old. She was trying to place a shaped block into a designated slot of a toy.
"She would get very frustrated and let out a scream if she couldn't get the block
to fit in right away or she would throw the block or hit the toy," says Runt.
Often, babies will get over-excited or over-stimulated and frustration will result.
Walker-Andrew recommends that parents try another activity after an outburst such
as this. "Allow your baby to express emotions and soothe your baby to help him learn
to modulate negative emotions more quickly," Walker-Andrews suggests.
At this stage a small cuddly stuffed animal or a soft blanket would help your baby
feel safe and secure as she grows and explores her ever-changing world.
Watching Your Every Move
The thought of a baby watching your every move may make some of us nervous and overly
protective. Herschkowitz has simple advice for parents: Model the behavior you expect
of your child.
Set and enforce guidelines appropriate for the age and temperament of the child.
Don't smile and laugh at behavior that is discouraged. The laughter she sees on
your face will only encourage her to repeat the behavior. Echo your baby's smiles
and cooing. Hold your baby firmly, distract her and speak quietly when she is angry.
Be consistent.
Herschkowitz reminds us that children need a warm and predictable environment to
form close relationships with those around them. If children are ignored or their
emotions are not met with proper responses, they may have difficulties forming positive
relationships later in life.
By Lisa Marie Metzler. This article is kindy provided by:
